like it

I'm not worrying.
Why are you worrying so much?
Just live a tiny bit.
Merry Christmas,
I hope you have a wonderful year.
2010 will be fabulous.
You've got to believe it!
Love
Charlotte

Fishheads and Flowers

It's one thing when you have not what you want, but when you lose what you had, that's the worst. You are overwhelmed. You would do anything to have it back to how it was when you wanted more then what you already had. But in perspective, you were probobly equally unhappy both times.

This is often relateable to my life, mostly through test results, but I've recently had a friend who's gone through this. And I just wish that things like this didn't need to happen, but they do need to happen. We need to make mistakes, because we need to learn.

skip skip skip

It's Saturday night, it's mid-october, it's cold, it snowed today, i'm home, getting sick, and I should be out having fun or something.
But at the same time it's ok. It's just when I am home I feel as if I should not be home. Anyhow, i'm not out, and that's the end of that.

I'm half-heartedly writing a french speech on a topic (chosen by the french teacher) on teenage issues, which is the dullest of topics, because while brainstorming I have realised that in some way, shape or form, I have seemed to already share my opinion on all of these issue with people. And now I must stand in front of the class and talk about what everyone already knows. Terribly boring.

Anyhow, my life is quite good right now. I have noting that I can rightfully complain aboput except the fact that I have very little-no money, which is always a bit of a downer, and another reason why I am in fact home writing this tonight. But, that is in fact what I get for going to the UK this summer.

In other news, school is fine. I fill my free periods with "group therapy" (we talk about everyone's relationship problemes, mainly one guy's, who's relashionship problem may in fact be resolved), guided mditation in the far stairwells, and shameless gossiping.

I have very little of interest to report. Little shop of horrors was amaizing, pope productions party was fun, gym party was nice, cancer climb was fine, okokok.

Finiteo
Charlotte

First impressions

So, school if great!
Running for student council.. fingers crossed on that one!
Tried out for band, quite the non-success.
On the rowing team, which I LOVE.. 9am practice was fun, and good to actually run, got to get back in to that.
Back at dance- so nice to be back!
Volleyball starts next week.

IB:
Music (eek- everyone in my class is a musical genius)
French (interesting, good class)
English (also really interesting, awsome teacher... a little scary)
Histoire European (great class- hard to pay good attention, but really funny)
Math (so far so good... really good teacher...thank gosh!!)
Biology (so far we looked at goo... typical, all good though)

Math tutoring and flute lessons hopefully otg very soon!
French quiz this week.

Met some new people. I think i'll end up being really close to certain people simply because they're in all my classes and have all my free periods. But that's ok! :) I had some people over last night for waffles, which was quite nice.

Music project!
Au revoir
Charlotte

The day before school-ish

So tommorow's the first official day of school
Technicly just an assembly.
I don't understand why I'm so sad.
I liked this summer, and I'm not ready for it to be over. I'm not ready for the inevitable stress. I wish I could be more optimistic right now. But I just can't.

Maybe tommorow

re-group/ changement d'avis

these words don't come easy

I know that when you're a teenager, people say that everything feels like it's the end of the world. And we can all be dramatic sometimes, anbd blow things dramaticly out of proportion. But that's ok. I love people who are always a little bit wiser than you, always a step ahead, always insightful, but incredibly modest and understanding and selfless. I am so thankful for having a really good friend like this. I probobly take it for granted too often, but I don't know what I would do without this person in my life, I honestly don't. I know I'm so lucky, I really am. All of us are. We all have friends who love us and appreciate us for who we are and what we contribute to eachother. We are comforatble with eachother, and trust eachother, and love eachother. Although it's not always obvious, I think we help eachother through everything. I don't always go to the same person for everything, but we all know eachothers strengths, and everything seems to balance itself out.

I just love my friends so much, and I'm just so greatful to have good friends, and I know that everntually, we weon't be as good of friends. But right now, this summer, I love the amaizing friends I have, and at this point, can't see how i'd get by without them. But I get that goes back to being dramatic again. Huh.

Charlotte

Give me a reason to carry on, to carry on

I'm off to Ireland in a few hours:

St.John's to Toronto, Toronto to Dublin, DUblin to Cork!

Two of my best friends made me this plane box which I SO want to look in, but am saving it until the plane! :)

I am excited!!

And I'll record everything. More then likely I'll just write it all down, I don't know if I have access to a computer.

Woot!

Yesterday way my birthday!

I had a birthday party in the evening, which was really nice, and so comforting to see everyone before I left.

I love my friends, and will miss them a lot!!

A bien tot mes amis!!

Charlotte

At three am, they played Oh Canada

True Patriot Love, and lalalalala
I am very proud to be Canadian.
I was booking a flight the other day, and while scrolling through all the counties of residence, I thought "wow, I am so happy I live here!"

Life is very good lately. Quite busy though, my cousins from Montreal are in town! I have a leadership developement weekend this weekend, and I'll be staying in residence and the university! It should be fun! :) And then On Monday I'm having a fair number of people over for my birthday! The next afternoon, I'm off to Ireland for a month! Yay!! I am quite excited, and have no idea what to expect. I haven't been away from home for more than a week before, and even then it's been with friends. I think it's going to be a fabulous experience. I'll miss everyone, but I want this so badly!

I wrote this out for my own sake. I feel as if I have a million things to do in the next 5 days.

Thursday, July 2nd
8:00-ish- bloodtest
10:00- 12:30-1- babysitting
1:00-8:00- get euros and pounds
buy toothpaste, toothbrush, leggings, shoppers drug mart things
buy all things needed for birthday party
sort out itinerary, etc
book hair appt
pack for LDW

Friday, July 3rd
1030- 2:30ish - see people
finish packing
3:00- LDW registration

Saturday, July 4th
LDW

Sunday, July 5th
LDW until 12:00

Monday, July 6th
My birthday!
7:30- Birthday party

Tuesday, July 7th
UK for a month!

Here's what's happening

Tuesday, I fly to Toronto, then Dublin, then Cork.
I stay in Cork for 2 weeks
-explore around Cork- Killarney, Waterford, Tipperary, serounding area
July 23rd, I go to Wales
July 26th I go to Oxford, England
July 28th I go to Cornwall, England
July 30th I go to Northamphire, England
July 31st, I go to London, England,
then I return to Northamphire until the 2nd
August 2nd, I go back to Cornwall
August 4th, I go to Liverpool, England
August 5th, I go back to Cork
August 8th, I go to Dublin, spend the night
August 9th, I go back home to St.John's

I'll keep y'all posted!

I can't run, I can't write and I can't make it home tonight.

report card was not so fabulous.

My parents have done the whole call all my relatives and give the whole speal on who got what award, who got honours, who got what marks, etc. My report was more or less them going on about my incapability to do chemistry, and how my other marks were not up to standards. Oh, and then there's the fact that my two sisters got a wide array of awards and agnowledgements and praise from their teachers. "Jen's report card was a dissapointment, BUT Sarah and Kathryn's report cards were fantastic. Sarah got the citizenship award, the student of the year, etc, Kathryn was the star at the leaving ceremony, she did a dance which she coreographed herself, everyone loved it, etc" I'm not jelous- it just makes me feel terrible. I'm awfully frustrated with myself. I am so un-orriginal. I'm stupid and incapable, and I have no fabulous quality which overides all my idiocy.

I'm never quite closed, but I ain't open to change

Oh Hallelujah!!!!!!!

IT IS SUMMER!

Wonderful, fabulous summer!

I have spent the past 4 days beyond happy. Mostly just lounging around the park with my best friends, wandering around downtown, or up signal hill. We watched the sun rise a few days ago. I've only been home one night out of the past four nights. It's been great. I am so excited for Ireland, and I am so excited for right now.

Happy 1st day of Summer!!!!

Charlotte

we will still need a song, to carry it all away.

Things I cannot do in math:
1. Orthocenter
2. Trigonometry EVERYTHING.
3. Sion, Cos, CSC, COT, SEC, everything related to that.
4. % system of equations.
5. Matrix multiplication.
6. Radians and square roots of the unit circle.

Well, that pretty much sums up the entire 2205 course. I am going to need a miracle to pass this exam. Getting into hour 6 of studying today, and it's only 3:20.

I just remembered that time at the market, you snuck up behind me and jumped on my shopping cart. Head over, I fell.

Exams exams exams, I hate being stressed and bitchy around exams.

< ----- 3 WEEKS!!! I'll make it, hopefully I won't fail anything before then.

Late May

Park
Hackysac with friendly level 3's
Dance
Walk to Simon's house
Morgan very upset
Secret tellings in some unknown park

That was my evening. And it was very nice indeed. Sometimes you just want to be serrounded by those you feel most comfortable with, and not a bunch of people that you think may judge you. That was tonight. And i'm so greatful for two of my best friends.

This weekend i'm studying. I may or may not go to a party tommorow night. And of course, open mic on Sunday. Open mic night had become more than a habit, it's a necessety for me now. I so look forward to relaxing on a Sunday night with local guitar players stummin' away and singing with all they've got.

I have exams far too soon. I'm going to Ireland this summer. I need to learn to cook, clean, and be patient. I need to learn a heck of alot more too. I also need to learn what the heck I want.

I am very content. :)

Chocolate

I thought you were the moon in the sky, but it turns out you were just a street light.

Oh, boys.
I think I've been too lucky. I mean I have so many fabulous guy friends, who would do anything for me, and who actually care about me and such, and who want nothing more than to be friends. Apparently not all guys are like that. Who knew.

At least I learned something this week.

Tommorow:
Walk for MS
volunteering
babysitting
memorise the entire life of John A macdonald
do a bio project
read 100 pages of a book
math review
history project
start exam review

It's gonna be great!

Chai tea is nice.
Au revoir
Charlotte

If only I could be bolder

I think there's only one type of folks. Folks. Hey Scout, you know, me too.

Oh my

Oh my gosh. I have had SO much dance lately. It's fabulous really, but so stressful and physicaly draining. Especially today. I won't go into details, but we underestimated how much performing we had to do, and gave it our all in the first 45 minutes. And the for the next two hours had to act as if we had energy when really we wanted to faint. Other than that, twpo hours of practice today, and the same for tommorow.

In other news, our school is on fire. Which REALLY isin't good, as I have 5 classes to do 30 classes worth of chemisty. Gonna be fab. BUT it's fabulous outside, and i'm loving late nights at the park with my friends, and mid-afternoon visits to an old teacher.

Anyhow, I think I'm going to go have a heart attack.
Charlotte

I'm just a moth, wanting to share your light

Hello
How are you?
Good I hope, no please, be great. Be fabulous. Be over the moon, overwhelmed by your own emotions in such a positive way you don't know what to do with yourself. Be in love, be revolutionized, be ecstatic, be free, be confident, be lovely. Tell me you are excited and have never been better. That things can't get any better. You've found love, hope, motivation.

That will make me happy. I have this mechanism. I can be sustained under other peoples hapiness and joy without being happy myself. The fact that you're happy will make me happy for you. When I'm unhappy, when i've lost all motivation and joy, i'll look to you. If you are on the other end of the string, joyful and fabulous. I will be too. I will be for you.

The problem occurs from time to time. I'm not happy, and you have nothing to change that. It's not your responsibility in any which way. But if you were happy, it would work in both of our favours.

Goodnight
Charlotte

Smile in the morning

Where did my body go?

We dance, we sing, we play magic cards

Well, seeing as how I can't quite bring myself to study anymore. I decided this was the second-best most productive thing I could do. This week has been so stressful and long and tiring. Yesterday I came home from school, and slept simply because I didn't have hours of studying to do. That left me with an immense amount of satisfaction. That and the fact that I skipped Interact, Tutoring and a School Skate to do so. Something I would have died before doing this time last year. So perhaps that is an accomlishement. Or a step back, whichever way you wish to look at it. Speaking of steps back, I got my math exam mark back today. As one of my best guy friends would say, "we don't talk about it". Hey, let's leave it at that. I'll turn it around, I always end up turning it around.

Anyhow, it's friday. After school, a big group of us headed to the park, and me and two good friends ended up playing magic cards. Upon returning from babysitting, I promply remembered how fabulous this weekend will be. But, maybe I will just tell you all about it when it's finished.

Sionora
Charlotte

I'm just pulling on a line on a line, but sometimes it pulls on me

Hello there.
I am writing this in between doing painful memorization of latin biology terms, and taking the easy way out of reading a french book. I am stressed, overwhelmed, and would must rather sleep. But, I feel as though I cannot complain as a meer 2 days ago I was dancing around the park in shorts and a t-shirt with my best friends with the sounds of a guitar neer and the sun beating down on my hair. I spent pretty much the whole weekend this way. Dancing and Singing and Laughing and Talking in the warm uncharacterstic spring air. It was absalutely all I could ask for. And so, keeping the prospect of more of that to come in my head, I shall continue through my painful biology studies and my looming french review.


Adios
Charlotte

It's really too bad, he became a prisioner of his own past.

I am exhausted. I dislike chemisty, math is tedious, I think I lost my chem and english book, I have a midtern on tuesday and two tests. I have gained so much wait it's terrible. I still have homework to do, yet I am falling asleep. I am annoyed and feeling guilty, but somehow not responsable for this. Ah well.

Goodnight to you.

que cera

Hello there,
vell break is over, I did very little work, and i have about 100 pages of To Kill a Mockinbird to finish before tommorow morning. But that is alright.
I am happy, and although wishing breakk would go on longer,
will be glad to have routine back.

It was a fabulous Easter break,
:)

the poor stay poor, the rich get rich

that's how it goes.

Everybody knows.



The past 48 hours or so have been so strange and so fabulous.

-my dad randomly decided it was time i go home and picked me up at 9pm from a poker night to the bewilderment of myself and about 10 of my friends.

-I witness the creation of one of the most gorgeous indie-ish songs by one of my best friends.

- A couple of my best guy friends end up cooking supper for us while having deep conversation with a very supring person to have serious conversation with.

- End up all staying the night (two of guy my friends and I at my good friends house)

- Following day cook Naan bread and Indian food with my sister, as well as yogurt banana smoothies.

- Go to a 16 year olds birthday party at the local science-ish centre until 1230 am.



Fabulous, strange. I left out a few details, but you really don't want to know.

I'm happy. It's ok



Leonard Cohen- get young and marry me?























Ah well, 3 days left of easter break,
and I hopefully get to see a good friend who I haven't seen all break tommorow,
so that should be nice!!

it's 217 am,
I should sleep.

Aurevoir
Charlotte

to deserve or not to desevve

You know, I really don't think they "deserved it". I mean.. what is that? How do you deserve or not deserve something. I mean... if you did something unkind to another person.. but what if that person "deserved" it... does that mean that you deserve good things? Maybe if we all deserved the same thing, there would be no need to make someone deserving of something less than what you feel you deserve of.

Maybe we should just stop being so selfish and so revengeful.

We walk around the house in high heels

Oh, today is pretty much summed up by..

Add some chocolate, a doctors appointement, some reading, alot of House watching (which by the way kind of makes me want to go into medecine), a bit of Office watching, some copying down of recipes, pluffies, clothes exchanging, and a heck of a lot of procrastinating, and that's my day! Tommorow, I plan on making Naan bread and a smoothie in the morning, and then going out somewhere- although it's sepposed to snow, so we'll have to see about that one!

House is a fab show. It's so interesting, and now i'm like ''hmmmmm, I would LOVE a job like that'', although i do not think most doctors are like that. Huh. Well, I seppose it's bed for me!

A demain

Et puis on commences...

Oh, well hello there.
This I sepposed would be called the pilot if it were a fresh tv series.
Or simply chapter one if a brand new stiff-paged book.
The introduction perhaps, on some how-to book, or a complicated school book, which would more than likely remained untouched after looking at the so called introduction.
But no, this is not a weekly tv show, nor a promising book, and it is definetly not a painful chemisty book, or anything of that sort.
This is me. My thoughts, which will perhaps turn into plans, into actions, into experiences. This is snipets of my sometime very mundane life, spelled out to my best ability in little segments.
A record, persay, or maybe moreso and semi-productivve past-time.

And i'll start with something I came across while aimlessly surfing the net after coming home from a babysitting job on a relaxing monday night. It made me smile, and I see much truth in it...

owait I lost it, hold on.....

got it!

http://www.swiss-miss.com/2009/04/jacks-life-lessons.html btw!

Hmm.. so tommorow I plan on dying my hair (plum perhaps) with my sisters, painting eachothers nails, swapping clothes (who needs malls!!?), and learning how to cook something, anything!!

Adios,

Charlotte